8 Myths and Facts About Borderline Personality Disorder
Written by Heather Cirmo
8 Myths and Facts About Borderline Personality Disorder
Borderline Personality Disorder is a mental health diagnosis that has been discussed more and more recently, often in the popular media. While increasing awareness of the existence of a diagnosis can be beneficial, it can also be detrimental and alienate individuals with that diagnosis when misinformation is spread. Myths and stereotypes about borderline personality disorder abound, and this creates unnecessary stigma. Unfortunately, borderline personality disorder is often inaccurately displayed and dramatized for views in television shows and movies. As such, it is important to address these myths directly to spread accurate information about the diagnosis and reduce the stigma, hopefully allowing those with borderline personality disorder to feel comfortable enough to reach out for the help they need.
Myth #1
Myth: People with borderline personality disorder have problems with their personalities.
Fact: Despite being classified as a personality disorder, being diagnosed with borderline personality disorder doesn’t mean there’s anything wrong with your personality! It does not mean that there is anything wrong with you as a person. Simply put, personality disorders are disturbances in the ways we relate to ourselves and others. Individuals with borderline personality disorder may struggle with feelings of emptiness, unstable self-image, chaotic interpersonal relationships, and splitting. With splitting, individuals may view others as either all bad or all good, and this viewpoint may shift from one extreme to the other.
Myth #2
Myth: People with borderline personality disorder have multiple personalities.
Fact: Borderline personality disorder is not the same as dissociative identity disorder. Dissociative identity disorder, which is often colloquially referred to as multiple personality disorder, is not classified as a personality disorder in the DSM-5. While individuals with borderline personality disorder may alternate between emotional extremes and may struggle with their own sense of identity, they do not alternate between separate, distinct personalities. They do not become different people when they experience symptoms, even though their thoughts and behaviors may change.
Myth #3
Myth: People with borderline personality disorder are manipulative.
Fact: Many people with borderline personality disorder experience a lot of anxiety, including a fear of abandonment. They also experience emotions very intensely and acutely, sometimes to the point that these emotions cause physical pain and discomfort. When this happens, they may reach out in a variety of ways. In these moments, they may be crying out for help to alleviate some of this emotional pain. They are not purposefully trying to harm or inconvenience others. Instead, they are doing what they think they need to do to feel better. Actively manipulating others requires negative intent, and most people with borderline personality disorder aren’t trying to hurt anyone.
Myth #4
Myth: People with borderline personality disorder can’t have healthy romantic relationships.
Fact: Romantic relationships may be difficult for individuals with borderline personality disorder, and they may require more work than they would for other people. This is often due to a history of unstable relationships, a fear of abandonment, and a probable history of trauma and abuse. However, with professional treatment and support from a partner who is understanding and patient, people with borderline personality disorder are capable of maintaining healthy, stable romantic relationships. With this diagnosis, self-esteem is often negatively affected, so it can be hard for individuals to understand how someone else can see positive qualities in them when they can’t even see them themselves.
Myth #5
Myth: Borderline personality disorder is rare.
Fact: Studies suggest that up to 5.9% of the global population will be diagnosed with borderline personality disorder at some point in their lives, though the exact percentage varies slightly between studies. It is estimated that one in every five individuals in inpatient psychiatric care has borderline personality disorder. It is one of four Cluster B personality disorders in the DSM-5, meaning that it involves erratic behaviors, intense distress, difficulty with emotion regulation, and impaired interpersonal relationships. The other three Cluster B personality disorders are antisocial personality disorder, histrionic personality disorder, and narcissistic personality disorder. Of these four diagnoses, borderline personality disorder and narcissistic personality disorder are thought to be the most prevalent.
Myth #6
Myth: Only women are diagnosed with borderline personality disorder.
Fact: While women are more likely than men to be diagnosed with borderline personality disorder, it is not uncommon for men to receive this diagnosis. It is estimated that one out of every four people diagnosed with borderline personality disorder is male, but that diagnosis rate may actually be low. In general, men are less likely to seek out mental health care and are therefore less likely to be diagnosed. Men also have higher rates of completed suicide, meaning that they may successfully take their own lives before they are able to receive proper mental health treatment. Even though it’s the same diagnosis, men with borderline personality disorder often present differently than their female counterparts. While women are more likely to experience internalized mental health symptoms, or symptoms that can’t be seen from the outside, men with this diagnosis are more likely to display externalized symptoms that are visible and apparent to others.
Myth #7
Myth: People with borderline personality disorder are dangerous.
Fact: The majority of people with borderline personality disorder are not dangerous. People with borderline personality disorder are significantly more likely to harm themselves than someone else, whether this be in the form of suicide attempts or non-suicidal self-injury. Studies have shown that around 70% of people with borderline personality disorder will attempt suicide at least once, and around 10% of people with borderline personality disorder will complete suicide. There is a misconception that individuals with this diagnosis are not serious when they talk about thoughts of suicide, but thoughts of suicide should always be taken seriously, both in individuals with and without borderline personality disorder. If you or someone you know is dealing with thoughts of suicide, please call 988 for support in your area.
Myth #8
Myth: Borderline personality disorder can’t be treated.
Fact: There are several psychotherapy treatment modalities that can be effective for people with borderline personality disorder. Dialectical behavioral therapy, or DBT, can be utilized in both group and individual therapy in both inpatient and outpatient settings. It was developed by Marsha Linehan, a mental health professional who herself was diagnosed with borderline personality disorder. It focuses on mindfulness, emotion regulation, distress tolerance, and interpersonal effectiveness skills. DBT is derived from cognitive behavioral therapy, or CBT, which is another effective treatment modality for borderline personality disorder.
If you’re noticing these destructive patterns in your relationship and need professional guidance, our team at Hello Calm is here to help. Don’t hesitate to schedule an appointment with us today and we can work together to foster a healthier and happier life for you.
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Heather Cirmo, LCSW
Heather graduated from Boston University with a Master’s in Clinical Social Work and from Columbia University with a Master’s in Intellectual Disability and Autism. She is professionally licensed as a Licensed Clinical Social Worker, and has a decade of experience in the mental health field. Heather moved from New York City to Las Vegas in 2019 and loves spending time roller skating, crocheting, and swimming.
